Conceptual Thoughts

I swish inside her full belly
and hear the sounds of
my drinking father
and her crying in the
middle of the night
we have committed a grave sin
the three of us
in the eyes of a strong
yet impatient Abuela
Como es que lo haz
hecho otra vez?
How is it that you once
again have given
your passion to a man
who cannot possibly
take good care of you
and your already fatherless
three daughters?
I hear the words and do
not understand
them
but I know the sensation
of tension
(her belly tightens)
and fear
(I suffocate and reach
for a deeper corner
of my little house)
and suddenly
the tension ends
the loud angry
grandmother
has slammed the door
and taken away
my sisters
and now it is just
the three of us
Daddy has
driven us to Arizona
Mommy is now
married
I swish happily
waiting to push out
of her canal
and look
into the eyes of
my nervous
but happy Mama.