August

AUGUST

12:23 am
of the last full month
of summer
two dogs snore
near my bed

the busy highway
throbs through the open window

a swoosh from speeding

cars and another from

an ancient ceiling fan

1 a.m.

it’s 93 or more

Loosen up

unwind

avoid frozen shoulder

the poodle’s frizz sways

in the breeze of an open window

how pretty the

ornamental grass

his paws are thick with
river mud
from a first time gallop 
with his new adoptive brother

they ran and kicked up  leaves

pebbles and dirt

along the Town Lake

who are these beings of light covered in fur and hair who

grace us with companionship for the muscled strength
of their short lives

DOG spelled backwards

is G –O - D

melting thoughts

in the heat of this Texas night

fluff the pillows for
the fifth time 

Or

just turn out the light.  

@Austin, TX 2005  (edited 2017)

@Austin 2005
edited 2017

Downstairs Neighbor

Downstairs Neighbor 

The day promises a scorching heat

grackles call out

the bird feeder is empty!

Fidgety squirrel squats on the gutter

peers down

on the lookout for three menacing dogs

who love the chase

a tipped lantern recalls last night's 

gathering of friends around a fire pit

roasting marshmallows

melting chocolate on graham crackers 

silent flowering cacti

embrace a mean sun

and the new season that will anchor them

to the rocky Texan soil

And there she sat

on a patio chair

crawling deeper

everyday into a grieving well

poor economics

bad job

constantly 

stuffed up head 

"I can't fuckin' smell"

she yelled across the yard

Is it worse than the cancer?

Her morning was night and night

The day 

An owl

A hungry panther

pouncing upon the hint

of a hopeful call 

and maybe just maybe 

a different diagnosis 

We heard 

We prayed 

And she roared 

Despair and disappointment

The massive cedars

towering pecan 

the heavy branched elms

could not muffle her wail and cry

for a job

for some hope

or just the simple aroma of

brewing coffee

for acceptance

Listen my sweet to the flutter of wings

Do you hear the fledglings begging for food 

chirp chirp chirp 

They can muffle the sound of a

terminal ticking clock

Ah look, the backyard gate is open
in comes yet another wave 

of untouchable heat about 

to settle with endurance

for another morbid day

into your now empty patio seat. 

Sincerely Yours

I am almost 47
not too tall
not too small
dark eyes like my mother
strong brown hands like my grandmother
a mixture of Creole and Indian bloods
ancestors from a land below rocky mountains
in steamy western jungles,
volcanoes and blackened rocks
from which there now grow corn, brush and maguey

even further back
hardy Iberians who lived by the sea,
fought for their independence
and have preserved a language
if not their dignity

My roots are as wild
as they are stable and strong
My father’s weaknesses were buried
beneath bottle and song
Memories of home can evoke tears and deep pain
though joy is my hope when I venture
the terrain
of discovering an orphan’s search
for a life and the source of wounds
inflicted upon a child
whose only armor was a faint whisper
and her lonely cry

I am cactus and wildflower
cool waters and dreams
of a woman whose visions speak
of learning
loving
and spirituality

I am heartiness in food
work and laughter
passionate fire
a fish out of water
deeply fulfilled
by the merging of emotions, trust and desire

I am the traveller of two cultures
and my journey though long
in the field of true living
has barely begun

I can blend life’s experiences
in a moment’s thought
I can feel my spirit soar
when I remember 

I am part of the divine

I have been comfort and pain
mystery and fear
a seeker of truth
always grateful for new direction

I am an old woman’s pilgrimage
I have always yearned to secure
guided in my lone journey by her image
and my heart

I am old
and I am young
reborn everyday
I can be showers of affection
or obsessed with perfection
a sunny day
a comfortable shoe
a roaring lion
or a bear’s cub

I am probably more
and somewhat less
whether, sister, dreamer
companera or lover,
I am
nonetheless
sincerely yours.

Seeds

Sitting there
in a small dish
are two little seeds
from a mulberry
or some other kind
of bush
they are now dried
as is the love with
the person I picked
them with on a road
trip to New Braunfels
a love that never
fully sprouted
a long distance love
that couldn't survive
on occasional phone calls
monthly visits
and workaholic
schedules
two little seeds
meant for a different
soil and much
more tender
waiting for the
blossoming
of Trust

The Tired Professor

I’m so tired

of playing some Big Mama

listening to the whines

of privileged

self-centered

lazy law students

with their

"I really want to know"

(But I hate you for

giving me a C+)

"I really do care"

(but I'm getting back at you

and giving you a fat zero

on this evaluation)

"I'm working hard"

(but I absolutely

need to go home

and plan my wedding)

"I just need one more

clarification about how

you're going to grade"

(and I'll blame you for

not getting a summer job)

"I really DO respect you"

(but I'm not going to raise

my hand in class no matter what)

"I'm just scared"

(but this

thought I'll never reveal

to them or even to myself)

"I can't help that I'm

a whining blood sucking brat"

(Yeah, that'll be the day I

hear them admitting that!)

Disturbed Love

I looked at you

and often saw myself

I cried ourselves to sleep

My heart yearned

for a moment

of calm

without the strange

mysterious fears

of your loving me

without the raging

tears that have sent

me looking for dark

rooms where I can

lust and drink

all alone

I crave

an ocean

of understanding

more than I think

any one person can give

more

than I'm able

to give

to my self

While I nurture

this faith

and learn to forgive

the errors that make

me human

I do need a friend

I need you

I love you

Marbles

I like them

especially

the ones

that look like planets

spinning on my

coffee table

and taking me away

to fantasy worlds

where I can be

a friendly alien

who will tell

the Uranians

or the Martians

or the Venutians

or the Saturnians

that I am a Pisces

and my species

that is

the human race

is sometimes

strange and confused

and obsessed with

militarism

and control

but that if

they will have a

little patience

with us

we could be

invited over for coffee

or tea

and then they

should send us home